Friday, September 23, 2011

You Belong to Me Chapter 12

EPOV

I never imagined it would be this easy to score more of my beloved Mellow Yellow. Forks Hospital was beyond deserted. I had the bottles tucked neatly into the pockets of my coat. As I was walking down the hallway, I heard a door open and giggling paired with a deep voice that I knew as well as my own. I ducked out of the way as Emmett and that fuck hot nurse Rosalie were adjusting their clothes after exiting a supply closet.

I watched as the clandestine lovers wrapped around each other for an incredibly passionate kiss. Was it wrong of me to be getting turned on by what I was seeing? Shit, my brother grabbed Rosalie's ass cheeks and she wrapped her legs tightly around his waist as they headed back to the closet again.

"Fuck, Rosalie. I can't get enough of you," Emmett said between kisses.

"Emmett, shut the hell up and fuck me again." It was like they were fucking super glued together or some shit. I saw his hand go under her skirt before they got the closet door shut. A bright red thong. I wouldn't expect anything less of Rosalie. I almost laughed aloud.

Once they were shut away and fucking like rabbits, I headed out to my car and back to the soothing warmth of my bed. I tossed back my M.Y.'s and closed my eyes with thoughts of hot chocolate-filled eyes and beautiful brown hair.

O_O_O_O_O_O_O_O_O

She is spread out on my bed like a naked goddess. Without a word her luscious body is calling to me. Her chest is heaving and pert breasts with their hardened nipples are shouting come to me, kiss me, love me. My gaze wanders downward to her toned abs. How I love to kiss that freckle that lies to the right of her stomach causing her to quiver, and her moans to spear me further in my attentions to her. Lower still, to the curly brown hairs that cover her mound, the promise land. I could see her glistening wetness, telling me how much she wanted me, needed me, my touch, my body, my cock.

I'm so ready for her, to worship her every way imaginable. I walk to the bed and lay down beside her. Without saying a word, she runs her hand through my tousled hair, to the nape of my neck. She sighs in contentment. I begin worship her. I kiss her behind her ear and bite and tug on her earlobe, as my finger tests her center. She twists and gasps as my fingers find her heat. She's so fucking wet, wetter than she has ever been before. I can feel it beginning to drip down the inside of her thighs. My tongue dips into the curve of her shoulder downward towards her collar bone. I give her gentle love nips with my lips, teeth and soothe them with my tongue as my hands move up to cup her breasts. She sighs, as my lips continue their journey to meet my hands.

"Yes, baby." She pulls me closer and I take full advantage by licking every square inch of her right breast, while my finger tugs forcefully at her left nipple. Her movements beneath me are becoming more frantic. A few times I have brought her to orgasm just by this, by worshiping her breasts with all that I am. "Oh, ooohhh, yes, harder. Bite me...hard!" She screams in my ear as her grip on my head releases, and her small hands find their way to my shoulders where she digs her nails into my skin, no doubt drawing blood, as they scrape and claw at me in her frenzied movements. Her legs are squirming beneath me.

"Do you like that, baby?" I already know the answer. I know her body better than my own. I own every square inch of this delectable petite body of hers. She knows it.

"Unf, ungh, oh baby. More, more, please." My hands, teeth, tongue and lips continue to show their utter adoration to her. She thrashes wildly beneath me, as I apply more and more pressure to her beautiful breasts. "Yes. YES. YESSSSSSSSS. Oh, Edward." She pulls my face up to hers and our mouths fight a raging battle of lust. Her hands seek purchase on my ass, as she pulls me. "I need you in me now!"

"Not yet, baby. You aren't as ready for me as you need to be." She groans brazenly as I place my lips on the freckle. She wiggles her hips as my tongue delves into her belly button and twirls around, my teeth scrape around the outer edge. "I'm going to really kiss you now," I tell her, my voice so husky, I barely recognize it. I move to her hip bone, where I massage her with my hands and my lips. I bite down hard on her hip bone, drawing a little blood. My lips lap up the blood from the bite as my fingers roam down to the curls. I can smell her musky arousal and my mouth waters.

I insert one finger, then two, into her slick folds. She spreads her slim legs further apart as my lips find their way to her clit. I remove my fingers and place them on her ass and she shudders as my tongue replaces them. I dive deep into her pussy, as I taste the unique flavor that is only Bella. Her juices are literally pouring out from her pussy and dripping onto my tongue into my mouth. I hummed with pleasure as her arousal gushed into me, which caused her to begin to thrust herself against my tongue with almost violent force. My thumb rubs circles and my fingers tug on her swollen clit, while my tongue continues to fuck her. I move my mouth to the engorged nub and bite down hard, as two fingers pierce deeply into her core, curving to hit her g-spot.

"Holy mother of God. Edward, fuck, yes, yes, yes, ungh, oooohhh." Her back arches off the bed, as her walls pulse almost forcefully around my fingers. I remove my fingers and look at my love. Her body is flushed from head to toe with pleasure. A sheen of sweat covers us both and I am not finished with her yet.

"Look at me, Bella." She looks as me, as I placed my drenched fingers into my mouth and lick her wetness from them, one by one. She groans, raises up and pulls my face to her. Her kiss consumes me, like a raging forest fire. She nips at my lower lip with her teeth. Then as her tongue invades my mouth, she rubs it across the roof of my mouth. Her tiny hands grab onto my ass as her legs wrap tightly around my waist.

"I. Need. You. In. Me. Now." She pleads during our hectic kiss. Our tongues are mating madly. Our mouths working together with such power that our teeth are clinking together.

We both hiss as my cock enters her, and her pussy begins to sheath me with its wetness. I can feel the walls pulsing hard, pulling me deeper and deeper into her with each masterful thrust. She is sucking me in so deep. The only sound in the room is the slapping of heated naked flesh against flesh and our lustful moans. I move my hands to knead her breasts, kneading and tugging, as I continue to penetrate her warmth with my hardness. I add a circling of my hips, as I thrust and she gasps. "Oh, Edward. I'm cumming. Push harder, baby, please, please, please!"

I can feel the tingling in my balls and I know that I won't last much longer, and I need her to cum with me. I move my hand between our bodies and reach her clit. With one final thrust and a flick of my finger against swollen nub, her walls clasp onto me with a strength I've never felt before, as I am pulled into her womb and my cum shoots deep inside her. After a moment of catching our breath, I collapse on top of her and brush her sweat-drenched hair from her face and kiss her on the forehead.

"Bella, baby, that was un-fucking-believable."

"Edward, I love you so much." She kisses me gently and cuddles into my side as I rollover beside her.

"Promise me, Bella. You belong to me. You will never, ever leave me. You are mine." I pull her so tight against me that she flinches.

"You know who I belong to. I'm yours. I swear. I will never leave you. You are all I will ever need." She snuggles into me even more and then I hear her breathing level out.

"You are mine, Bella. You love me. You will always love me."

O_O_O_O_O_O_O_O

I jerked awake from my erotic dream and my blankets are soaked with sweat and my cum. It felt so real. She was with me and she still loved me. In my dreams, I don't have to lose her and how she once felt about me. I reach over to the drawer, pull out three Mellow Yellows and swallow them back. I needed her. I needed her like I needed my next breath. I could close my eyes and still see Bella reflected there. She was in my head permanently. There was nothing I could do to wipe her from my memory if I even wanted to. If my dreams were the only way she could be with me, so be it. I would hold on to her with everything that I had in me. I took one more M.Y. and had the Sandman take me back to my one true love.

The next morning I made my way downstairs for breakfast before physical therapy. I had already taken some M.Y. before I came down. Therapy was just impossible to get through without a little assistance from my beautiful yellow buddy, and no not Sponge Bob, even though when I went back to sleep I swear that I heard his theme song playing while I fucked Bella.

Emmett stumbled down the stairs as I had finally made myself comfortable in the dining room chair.

"Hey, Em." All I heard was a little grumble from him. "Did you have a hard night?" I snickered at him. He shrugged. Dumb ass was so fucked out from his while sexcapades with my nurse that he didn't catch my little double entendre.

"I didn't get much sleep, Edward." He snapped at me. Mom flicked him in the ear as she set a plate of pancakes, eggs and bacon in front of each of us. "Dammit, Mom! That hurt."

"Don't use that tone of voice with me or your brother. If you aren't getting enough sleep, maybe you should go to bed earlier." The bite of food I had just taken flew across the table and landed on Emmett's face as laughter roared from my mouth.

"What the fuck, E!" He grabbed the napkin and wiped his face. I couldn't stop laughing.

"Sorry, Emmett. Just Mom scolding you like you are a little kid or something." I got out between laughs. Emmett picked up a piece of his scrambled eggs and threw it at me. That got him not just an ear flick from Mom, but the dreaded ear flick with a twist. I cringed a little in my seat as I saw him wince.

"Fu..." Emmett started to say and corrected himself. "Geeze, Mom. You and Ally are so vicious for such small people!"

"Emmett, just because we are small doesn't mean that we don't know how to make someone who is bigger than us bend to our will," Mom said as Dad walked into the kitchen and grabbed her for a kiss.

"Oh, Mom, Dad! Take it to your bedroom. That's not the kind of thing that I want to see cooking in the kitchen," Emmett said which earned him a scowl from Mom and a laugh from Dad.

"Emmett McCarty Cullen! Don't make me flick you again!" He sunk back in his seat with Mom's threat. "Edward, you need to hurry and eat so I can take you to your therapy appointment."

"Mom, I am more than capable of driving myself there."

"I'm sure you think you can now. By the end of your therapy session you will be too sore to do much of anything. Plus, I want to have some special time with your father while you are there." She looked Emmett while she said the words and laughed at his reaction.

"Mom, really, that's WTDMI! Not just too much information, but way too damn much information," Emmett said as he rolled his eyes at her and got up from the table. "E, where's the homework you've got finished that I need to turn in for you." Shit, I had totally forgotten that he was going to take that to school for me today.

"Emmett, there were a few math problems I was having trouble with. I will finish them after physical therapy and you can take them to school tomorrow for me. It's not like I don't have almost every assignment here already for the rest of the year to keep me busy."

"Sure, E. Whatever. We all know that the teachers are going to pass you no matter what the hell you do or don't do." That really pissed me off. I got up and got straight in Emmett's face.

"What the fuck is your problem? I didn't fucking shoot myself in the damn leg."

"No, but you sure as hell are the one who caused the gun to be somewhere where it could shoot your sorry ass to begin with." He shoved me and I shoved back.

"Stop it now!" Dad screamed at both of us. "Emmett, you need to apologize to your brother right now."

"No, Dad. I don't think I do." He stormed off and headed up the stairs and I heard his bedroom door slam shut. I sank back down in the chair and put my face in my hands. I felt a gentle hand on my shoulder.

"It's OK, Mom. Let's go ahead and get this show on the road." I ran my hands through my uncontrollable hair and grabbed Mom's hand and kissed the back of it. "I would hate for you to not get as much special time with Dad as you need today." I laughed and my laughter stopped as soon as I'd earned my own ear flick.

Physical therapy was the same shit, different day. It had been three weeks now since I scored my extra M.Y. I was so glad that I did, because that helped me get through the extra therapy sessions that I did by myself everyday, even the three or four times a week that I had my sessions with Felix. Had I not taken those extra bottles, I would have been out of my M.Y. a long time ago.

I told the fucker Felix that I could actually run on the treadmill but he said I still wasn't ready yet. What-the-fuck-ever. It's my body and I knew it like the back of my hand. I had no other choice but to push myself to the limit. I wanted to play college football. If I didn't get myself up to where I was before Bella shot me, I would never get my chance. It wasn't very long until Aro Blackheart was coming to check on me in person to see if I had healed.

As soon as Mom dropped me off after my latest session with Felix, I took 3 more Mellow Yellows and headed downstairs to our home gym. I would show that asshole that my body could make it running on the treadmill. I started the pace at a mile an hour and my leg had a twinge or two but no big deal.

I slowly kept increasing the pace until I was up to a run. God, it felt so fucking good to finally be doing what I wanted. I closed my eyes and ran. I ran for all I was worth. I was sweating so much that my eyes were burning from all the sweat that had dripped into my eyes. I reached over to get a drink of water and the next thing I knew my elbow had accidentally increased the treadmill's speed. I felt my injured leg hyper extend itself as I flew off the machine. I heard more than one thing snap and even through my Mellow Yellow induced haze I was in horrendous fucking pain.

"Fuck! Mom!" I laid down on the floor and I looked at my leg. It was in the most horrible position imaginable. "Mom!" I looked up at the treadmill and didn't see my cell phone sitting on the top. It must have fallen off when I was tossed like a damn rag doll to the ground. I looked around me and didn't see it. I tried repeatedly to stand but it just wasn't going to happen unless I had some kind of help. I was exactly like that little old lady that Emmett and I used to laugh at in the commercials for falling and not being able to get up. Fuck my life.

I thought I heard the door open upstairs. "Mom! Dad! Em! Alice!" I yelled. "I'm in the gym. I need help!"

I heard him before I saw him. There was my best friend, Jasper. "Edward, what the fuck have you done now?" He shouted at me.

O_O_O_O_O_O_O_O_O

Jasper somehow managed to get me into the car and to the emergency room. As usual, Dad was on duty and he immediately shit a brick when he saw me.

"Son, what happened to your leg?" He began to examine it and I couldn't contain the scream when he tried to move it around.

"I was on the treadmill walking. When I reached for my water, my damn elbow increased the speed and before I knew it my ass was on the ground and my leg fucking shaped like a pretzel." I didn't exactly lie to dad. The elbow had sped things up.

"On a scale from one to ten, how would you rank your pain?" Dad was in full doctor mode now.

"Dad, ten doesn't come close. How about infinity?" I saw Emmett's main squeeze come into the exam room.

"Nurse Hale, please administer a dose of morphine. Edward, I'm going to call Dr. Richardson and have her come examine you. I'm going to run an MRI and have x-rays taken. I'm fairly certain she is going to have to perform surgery on your leg. I don't think we should wait to do it. You will likely be in surgery in a few hours. I'll call your mother and let her know what's going on and have her call Alice and Emmett." He left the room to order the tests and I was stuck with the one my brother has been sticking it to.

"So, Nurse Hale, how long have you been fucking my brother?" I smirked.

Rosalie was far from gentle when she gave me the shot.

"What the fuck, Rosalie! You did that on purpose, and you still haven't answered my question."

She looked at me with her almost violet eyes filled with mock innocence. "I have no idea what the hell you are talking about." She turned on her heels and left.

The morphine knocked me on my ass pretty fast. The next thing I knew, Mom and Dad were by my side and Dr. Richardson was in the room.

"Edward, I was just informing your parents that we would be taking you into surgery in about an hour once the OR is prepped. We should have you in and out in two hours tops. Any questions?"

"When will I be able to get on the football field?" Dr. Richardson looked at Dad then back at me.

"Only time will tell Edward. Let's get you fixed up first."

Carlisle POV

I watched as Dr. Richardson began to operate on Edward's leg. We were in this same operating room not long ago after Edward was shot. The damage from the accident today made the damage from the shooting seem as minor as a splinter. His leg was bad, very bad. His dreams were gone. Edward would never be able to play football again. That much, Zafrina told me after she saw all of the scans of his leg. His fall from the treadmill damaged every tendon and ligament that could be damaged.

He was always going to walk with some kind of limp. That would break his spirit. Edward was always athletic and outgoing and had always been on the move. He always quick on his feet. He would never be quick on his feet again. He would not be the number one pick for USC's quarterback any longer. Edward had really never looked past playing ball. He had no back up plan in place of what to do after he was no longer able to play football. He was going to be absolutely devastated. I had no idea how to tell him that sports were over for him.

I was brought out of my revelry by words and sounds and doctor never wants to hear during surgery. My heart was pounding in my ears and I could only make out fragments of what was being said. "Severe respiratory distress." "Blood pressure dropping." "Heartbeat's irregular." "He's coding." "Crash cart now."

My head snapped up and my eyes filled with tears as I heard the sound of the heart monitor shrieking in its solid tone. He had no heartbeat. Edward's heart had flat lined.


Sunday, September 11, 2011

You Belong to Me Chapter 11

Chapter 11

Disclaimer: We don’t own Twilight... If we did, we’d be on vacation on our own version of Isle Esme!


Songs

“Lean on Me” Bill Withers

“That’s What Friends Are For” Dionne Warwick

“Love Like This” Natasha Bedingfield

“Survivor” Destiny’s Child

BPOV

“Bella Swan, It’s been a long time. I don’t know if you remember me or not, I’m Jacob Black.”

“We used to play together when we were 5. We were in Junior High together for a little while, too,” he added.

As I look this handsome stranger in the eyes, I suddenly remember a little long haired boy, playing in the mud. He had such an infectious smile, you couldn’t help but be in a happy mood. Any time we were playing together as children and I had one of my many accidents, all it took was the sweet look in his kind, dark eyes and that smile and I instantly forgot about the new injury to my overly clumsy body.

“Jacob, yeah, I remember. How have you been?” He still had the nicest smile I’d ever seen. Jacob’s cute dimples don’t hurt much either.

“I’ve been good. So, my dad tells me you’re going to be with us for the rest of the school year. If you want, I can show you around and introduce you to people.”

“Thanks, Jacob. That would be great.” It was nice to at least know someone here. Maybe things were finally starting to look up for me. I still missed him with every breath I took, but maybe Jacob would help distract me from my self-imposed torture.

I started looking around the student area and noticed that there were people walking by us, pointing and smiling.

“Uh, Jacob... Why are they looking at me like that?” I always hated to be the center of attention and it was like there was a spot light straight on me shouting “Look at me! Look at me!” I wanted to crawl in a cold dark hole and be by myself.

“Really, do you have to ask, Bella. Everyone around here thinks you shooting Edward, is badass!”

“What?” I inwardly cringed. How could people think that horrible accident that caused my heart to shatter into a million pieces was a good thing. “That’s just... I have no words, Jacob. It was an accident. I didn’t mean to shoot him. I loved him.” I could feel the tears threatening to fall. I wished once again that I was a much stronger person who could control her emotions so everybody wouldn’t be able to read me like I was an open book or something.

“We know it was an accident, Bella. Everyone knows how Edward treats people, and they all think he got what was coming to him. Karma can be a bitch and I’m pretty sure that your ex has found that out first hand.” Jacob gently rubbed his large hands down my arms trying to comfort me. “I’m sorry if I’m making you uncomfortable, Bella. I just wanted you to know the truth of what’s up with everyone around here. Keep smiling, Bella. I swear to you that you can always count on me because that is what friends are for.” I couldn’t have stopped myself from returning the smile that he gave me.

A student I didn’t know smiled and waved as he walked by. “Hi, Bella. Welcome!” he said.

“Jacob, I don’t even know him.”

“I told you, Bella. Around here you’re famous. Let me show you more of campus. I know that you are going to love it here.” He reached out his hand for mine. I eyed him wearily and those damn dimples of his drew me in. His dark hand was so warm, almost comforting against my small, pale palm. He looked over at Emily who had been leaning against the wall talking with some friends while occasionally glancing over at me to make sure that I was doing OK. “Hey, Em, come on. Let’s show Bella here all the ins and outs of the best high school in Washington State.” She walked over, her eyes brimming with excitement and eagerness.

“Oh, Bella, wait until you see our yearbook room. The things you are going to be able to do with our equipment is out of this world!”

“Sure, I’m ready to see everything. I can’t wait to get started.”

“Great, let’s go,” Jake said. Our first stop was the state of the art journalism room where I met our adviser Erica Williams. She was super cool and thrilled that I had so much experience. The rest of the campus was as beautiful on the inside as it was on the outside. It was so hard for me to believe that this was a high school campus. I had never even seen a college campus that was this incredible, even on the many journalism field trips that I had gone on with Alice.

Jake looked at his watch and gently squeeze and released my hand. “I hate to cut things short, Bella, but I’ve got basketball practice in 30 minutes and I need to get changed. Right now we are ranked first in the state in our division.”

“Bella, the team is so great. Just wait until you see all the guys in action. They are undefeated so far,” Emily said. “With that kick ass camera of yours, I am beyond sure that this year’s basketball pages will be so incredible that it will feel like the players are literally jumping off the pages.”

“It will be fun. I haven’t used this camera for action shots yet, it will be interesting to see what pictures I can get,” I told them. Jacob gave me a huge bear hug and grinned at Emily.

“See you both later. Have fun, Bella. If you need me for anything, anything at all, don’t hesitate to call. Em has my phone number.” He winked and began to jog back to the dorms.

“Bella, I am so glad that you are here. The rest of this year is going to be absolutely amazing,” Emily told me.

“I’m glad that I’m here too. Let’s head back to the yearbook room. I’ve got some really cool ideas that I would love to share with you.” Emily was almost bouncing up and down with excitement as I finally began to face the fact that my life as I had known it was officially over. I guess it was time for me to find out who Isabella Marie Swan was … without Edward Cullen.

O_O_O_O_O_O_O_O_O_O

I was shocked to find that six weeks had gone by and that I was more than enjoying my time here. Emily and Jake were helping to fill the huge hole that had been left in my chest. There were even some days where I actually forgot about him. There were even days when I didn’t have one single, solitary thought about him or us at all.

Usually, when I least expected it, those green eyes would taunt me and tempt me in my dreams. Well, some were incredible dreams that I still wished I could find a way to come true. Edward and I together years from now with a beautiful brown-eyed daughter with her version of Edward’s uncontrollable bronze hair. Other times they were nightmares that I wish I could find a way to erase from my memory forever. I can’t even think about what happened in those nightmares without shaking or crying. They were so real, so painful. I could always lean on Emily and Jacob. For some reason, it always seemed easier for Emily to cope with me on my bad days. She was always there with a shoulder for me to lean on if I needed it. She told me that sometimes she could see the sorrow in my eyes. On those days she did anything and everything to make that sorrow disappear. She was absolutely one of the most incredible people I ever met. Jacob was always there for me, but if I mentioned Edward’s name, his eyes sometimes glazed over in what appeared to be anger. He always told me that I was imagining things. Honestly, Jake and Emily saved me. They also were the only ones who really knew me. I wasn’t my own person before I met them. I was part of Edward and Bella. Or the version of me that Edward wanted me to be. It’s been incredible for me to find out who I really was and who I was capable of being on my own.

Jacob was right to be cocky about how great our school’s basketball team was. The first game it took me a bit to get the settings on the camera figured out so the action photos were crisp and in focus. Once I got everything set up perfectly and into the groove, my pictures were unbelievably good.

I would have never in my wildest dreams imagined how many people would eventually see one of my photographs.

At the final round of the state championship game, we went into overtime against the reigning state champions. There were only ten seconds remaining on the clock when Jacob made it to the basket. My finger was able to capture the moment as Jacob slam dunked the ball for the winning shot into the basket, breaking the backboard into hundreds of pieces. His face was full of determination that this shot was the shot.

While I was flipping through the photos and saw the best picture that I knew I had ever taken a man tapped me gently on the shoulder.

“Excuse me, Miss. I’m Everette Lexington from the Seattle Times. You attend QIS, right?”

“Yes, I do. I’m Bella Swan.” I reached out to shake his hand and he handed me his business card.

“Would you mind letting me look at that picture you were just grinning so widely yet. From a distance it looked a lot better than mine.”

“Sure.” I pulled the review menu up on my camera and I knew that my face was full of pride. Not only because my friend had done something amazing and won the game, but because I, Bella Swan, was very proud of something that I had accomplished on my own. I glanced over at his face and his eyes were alight with astonishment.

“This is one of the most incredible pictures that I have seen. Absolutely incredible how you were able to get every detail of that moment perfectly captured.” I could feel myself blushing at his kind words. “Your picture is definitely better than mine. I would love to use this in the paper and we will pay you for using it. If you’re interested, that is.”

“Really? I mean, yes! I would love for you to use this in the newspaper!”

“Fantastic, Bella. My email address is at the bottom of the card. We can’t pay you much for the photo, only $25, but you will get your byline listed too.” I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. I didn’t care about the money at all, but my photo going into a professional newspaper had me beyond excited.

“No, that’s totally fine, Mr. Lexington. I will head to the dorm and email this to you as soon as I can.” We shook hands again and I saw Emily running towards me.

“Thank you, Bella. Be on the lookout for your photo in the paper tomorrow morning.”

“We won! We won! We won,” Emily screamed as she threw her arms around me.

“I know! I am so proud of Jake! I can’t wait to see him to congratulate him,” I told her.

“We should all go out to dinner and celebrate before we head back to campus,” Emily said.

“That would be... Crap, I can’t. I’ve got some amazing news of my own. Check out this picture that I took of Jake.” As Emily looked at the photo, her eyes were almost bugging out of her head.

“Oh. My. God. Bella! That picture! I have no words. It’s … It’s... WOW!” She giggle and hugged me again. “That is definitely going to be the dominant on our boys basketball page layout. Damn, our boy Jake looks really fine in that photo doesn’t he?” She winked at me.

“You know Jake and I are just friends.”

“Sure. You keep telling yourself that! God, do I love a fine muscled up man covered in a sheen of sweat,” Emily sighed dreamily and I smacked her in the arm. “OK. OK. So you said you have news. What’s up?”

“The reporter from the Seattle Times saw my photo and asked if they could use it in tomorrow’s paper!” I was bursting with excitement.

“Bella, I am so proud of you. Your picture is going to be in the sports section of the Times tomorrow! Oh, wait until Jake finds out!” She snort giggled which caused me to laugh until I was almost crying.

“How right you are, Emily. He’s already got a big enough head as it is. Once he finds out he’s going to be in the newspaper it’s going to get even bigger. I’m going to text Jake and let him know that we are headed back and will see him later tonight. Let’s get me professionally published.” I packed up all the equipment and Emily and I headed back to my beautiful car. Dad had let me drive it to Seattle for the game and I knew that he and Sam would come by to take my beautiful baby back to its sheltered home at Charlie’s house.

The next morning Emily and I were awakened by a very loud pounding on our dorm door. I moaned as I looked at the clock. It was only 7 in the morning. Emily and I had been up giggling and talking until 4AM, so I was praying whoever it was at the door had a damn good reason to be there. I threw on my robe while grumbling and I saw that Emily had finally wandered from her room as she was wiping the sleep from her eyes.

“Who is it, Bella?”

“Obviously someone with a death wish. You better have a...” I started as I opened the door to find Jacob with the most incredible look I’ve ever seen on his face. He’d had something in his hands and it fell to the ground as he picked me up and enveloped me in an embrace and began spinning us in circles.

“Bella!” His smile was so big it could probably have been seen from outer space.

“Jake! Put me down you big lug!” I hit at his chest. “You’re making me dizzy! You’re like a dog trying to chase its own tail for crying out loud.” He and Emily both laughed at me.

“Sorry, Bella.” He released me but his smiled never wavered. “Oh, shit! Where is it? Wait until you see this. It is the most incredible thing EVER!”

He looked into the hallway and came back with the newspaper and held up the front page of the Seattle Times. “It’s me!”

My mouth hit the floor with a resounding thud as I took in the front page of the paper. Almost the entire front page was my photo. I gently took the paper from Jake and collapsed onto the couch. I rubbed my fingers across my name under the photo and felt tears forming in my eyes.

Jacob knelt in front of me and Emily came to sit beside me on the couch. Both of their faces were filled with concern.

“Bella, are you OK?” Emily asked while soothingly patting my arm.

“I’m sorry, Bella.” Jake mumbled as he tried to take the paper away from me. I slapped his hand away.

“Give me a minute,” I told them. “Guys, these are not sad tears. I can’t believe that...” My crying picked up. God, I am such a fucking girl. Getting emotional just because my picture was in the paper I chided myself. “My picture is on the front page of the paper. My picture...” My voice trailed off. “This is the happiest that I have been in a long time. Thanks so much for being my friends and sharing this unbelievable moment with me.” I leaned my head on Emily’s shoulder and Jake came to sit on the other side of me wrapping his arms around me.

“This is your moment, Bella. You were meant to shine brightly for all to see,” Jake said as he kissed me gently on the forehead.

“I am finally seeing that. God, I’ve got to call Charlie and tell him.” I jumped off the couch to Jake’s howling laughter and called my parents to share my wonderful news with them.

O_O_O_O_O_O_O

Just when I thought that things couldn’t get any better, I got a phone call that left me totally speechless. Sports Illustrated had seen my photo and they wanted to use it. Hot Damn! I was going to be published in the best sports magazine in the country. They even paid me for the photo, even though just having my picture and my name in their magazine would be more than I could have ever hoped for.

I continued work with Emily on the yearbook and as we submitted the last deadline, we felt a huge relief.

“Emily and Bella, I am so proud of the work you’ve done on this yearbook. It’s definitely going to be the best yet,” Ms. Williams, our adviser, told us. “I am definitely going to submit our book to the Columbia Scholastic Press Association for a critique and Crown judging. It wouldn’t surprise me if you ladies helped us nail down a Gold Crown.”

“Do you really think so?” Emily asked with awe in her voice. Crown awards were the most sought after yearbook awards by the best high school and college publications throughout the U.S. Only a handful out of hundreds of yearbooks received a Gold Crown each year.

“Honestly, the two of you are definitely a force to be reckoned with.” Ms. Williams hugged us both.

“Bella, I was waiting until the last deadline was finished to not put more stress on you, but I’ve got some messages for you.”

“Really, from whom?” I was really confused. There wasn’t anyone that I could think of that would leave me a message through my adviser.

“This almost never happens for students in the field of journalism to be recruited when they are in high school. Two schools have contacted me and have offered you a full scholarship for you to attend.” I couldn’t find my voice. I was going to get to do what I loved and I was going to be able to do this on my own without any help from Charlie or ReneĆ©.

“Which schools?” Emily asked before I could even form a more coherent thought.

“The Walter Cronkite School of Journalism and Mass Communication and the Gaylord College of Journalism and Mass Communication. Both schools are interested for you to work on either their newspaper or yearbook in graphic design and photography. They are very impressed by your work.”

“Isn’t the only way they’ve seen my work was the one photo of Jake that was published?” I asked Ms. Williams.

“Well, I kind of sent them other samples of your work when they asked for them.” Ms. Williams was beaming with pride over all the accomplishments that I had been able to make over a short time. “So, Bella, what do you think? Are you going to be a Sun Devil or a Sooner?”

My mind was spinning. I knew both of these schools and the education that they could offer me would be the absolute best. Now I just needed to decide whether or not I wanted to go to school with my family nearby or if I was ready to go out on my own.

I couldn’t believe how much my life had changed in just a few months. I couldn’t believe how I had changed as a person. I was finally Bella. I was myself. Finally, I knew who I really and truly was.

Monday, September 5, 2011

You Belong to Me Chapter 10

Chapter 10

Disclaimer: We don't own Twilight...if we did...well, we would have been in the Breaking Dawn Wedding scene and we would know what Bella's wedding dress looks like! :)

Songs:

"In the New Year" The Walkmen

"Need" Hana Pestle

"He's Gone" Orianthi

"Can't Believe This Is Me" Jennifer Lopez

BPOV

I was still reeling from the fact that Edward had put a restraining order on me. What the hell? It was an accident! There was no reason for that fucking order. He knows that I love him, even though it's all over. It's all over now. I'd been biding my time here in Arizona in my mom's new palatial estate, playing with the new "toys" that she got me, while I waited for my dad to arrange for me to transfer to the Quileute Indian School at the La Push Reservation. I really am enjoying all of the graphic design programs I've been playing with. I've been manipulating photos of Edward in Photoshop constantly. Sometimes I make images of him as a sweet, gentle lover. Sometimes I remember him as the asshole that he was, who with the power of his words, tore me to shreds. Right now, my favorite image of him is the one where I turned him into Rosemary's baby, the son of satan. I thought it was pretty apt considering my soul's status at the moment.

The Quileute Indian School is usually for Native American students only, but occasionally they accept non-Native students to attend. Since Dad's best friend, Billy Black, is on the board of directors, there was going to be no problem for me to be enrolled. Despite the fact that I hated transferring to a new school the last semester of my senior year, I knew that I didn't have a choice in the matter. Fate took matters into her own hands and left me reeling.

I knew there was no way I could face Forks High School, even if Edward didn't have the restraining order keeping me away from him. Life as I knew it was gone and I knew that it wasn't all my fault. Edward will never forgive me for shooting him. I've destroyed our future just for proving a point that I wasn't scared of him, when he was trying to bully me. I've done a lot of thinking about everything that happened that horrible day. I can't take all the blame. He was the stupid moronic fucker who brought a gun to my house and told me to kill him. What kind of sick fuck does that? Simple. The sick fuck who will always own me- body, mind, heart and soul.

So, I would start school on Monday. Mom insisted on buying me a first class ticket for my flight to Seattle from Phoenix. She said that nothing is too good for her little girl. I can't complain anymore about her spending money that she doesn't have, after she won a record $375 million, before taxes, in the Powerball lottery.

Even though I was going home, I really wasn't going home. I would be living in the on-campus dorms with the other students who attended QIS. To say that I was nervous was an understatement. It would be nice to at least know one person there. I've heard a lot about the campus. Rumors are that it could be one of the best kept educational secrets in the state. The school sits on 40 acres of land and was originally founded in 1930. It started out as a training school for orphans, later to have become a trade school, and is now a full blown middle school and high school for students. The school offers a wide variety of courses, even more than Forks High School does. The athletic teams are some of the best in the state, making it to the playoffs in almost every sport played. The number of state championships under the school's belt are staggering.

The only part that I was looking forward to, other than the eventual road to graduation, was the yearbook. The current yearbook editor had just moved out-of-state and the adviser was frantically trying to find someone to fill the spot. Billy told the teacher about my qualifications and I was "hired". I was almost excited that I would be able to put my top of the line camera to good use. There was no doubt that QIS's basketball teams would make it to state this year and I would have the chance to take some kick ass slam dunk shots, with the huge fucking lens mom got me.

I discovered that I love absolutely everything about graphic design. It's amazing. During the day, I can still be by myself, or at least in my own world, temporarily distracting my mind from its well of torment. I love taking a plain image from my camera and taking my pictures to create magazine-like pages that tell their story.

It was finally time to go back home, to Forks. I packed all my new clothes and techno gear in the new Louis Vuitton luggage set my mom bought me. It cost an insane about of money, but even I had to admit that it was fucking beautiful to look at.

Mom and Phil drove me to Sky Harbor International Airport early in the morning.

"Honey, you don't have to go. You can stay here and finish school in Phoenix. We can find you the best school money can buy." She's been trying to get me to stay for good since I stepped off the plane.

"Mom, I love you and I love you too, Phil, but I need to go back to Forks. It's been my home for years and I can't just leave it for good, not yet anyway."

"Even after everything..."

"Mom, I just can't explain it. I have to be there."

"If you change your mind, we can come and get you anytime, day or night. Okay, sweetie?"

We checked most of my luggage at the curb, but my new camera and laptop, they were being carried on with me. I was pretty sure I would get the laptop out once electronic devices were permitted and work on some of the photos I had taken of the Arizona desert in the winter.

Mom and Phil followed me to the security checkpoint. Phil gave me a quick one-armed hug. "Love you, Bella."

"I love you too, Phil." I looked at mom and she was tearing up. It never failed. She is the queen of water works and I don't mean the property from the Monopoly game.

"Have a safe trip, my dear sweet, Bella." She hugged me tightly to her and I embraced her just as tight.

"I will, mom. I love you. Thanks. For everything."

She kissed me on the cheek. "Anytime, my darling. Call me when you land."

"I will." I handed the security guard my ID and my ticket. As I looked back through the glass wall and I passed through security, I saw mom wrapped in Phil's arms. She was still crying and he was rubbing her back, comforting her. I had never been jealous of my mom until that moment. I wanted that back. I felt the tears threatening to fall. I quickly composed myself and waved to them and made my way to the gate for my flight.

O_O_O_O_O_O_O_O_O_O

Dad was actually waiting for me, as I got off the plane in Seattle. One of the perks as being a cop, he could by pass the security checkpoint without a ticket.

"Hey, Bells." He reached to take the carry-on from me.

"Hi, dad. I've got it." He looked upset that I wouldn't let him help me. "I've got a lot more bags that we will need to pick up. You can help me carry those."

I noticed he was looking closely at the bag. "New luggage?"

"Yep. A whole set. I tried to tell her no, but with my new laptop and camera needing as much protection as possible, I didn't fight her long." I hugged my bag to my chest and dad grinned.

"Do I even want to know what all your mom bought you while you were visiting her?"

"Probably not, dad." I smiled at him.

"How was your trip?" He asked as we finally made our way to baggage claim.

"Well, dad, it was at least warmer and drier than it is here. I enjoyed seeing the new house. I still can't believe after all these years of playing the lottery that mom hit the big one. I kept telling her I didn't need her to buy me all these things." I held up my laptop bag. "But honestly, dad, I would marry my laptop and camera if it was legal."

"Well, I'm glad you enjoyed your little gifts, because that isn't everything your mom got you." He rolled his eyes. What in the hell did Renee do now?

"What do you mean?" I asked him cautiously.

"You'll see soon enough." Charlie harrumphed. "Let's get all your luggage gathered up and we will head to the house. Are all those yours?" He pointed to the luggage on the carousel that matched mine.

"Yes. Yes, it is." I hid a smile, as I heard dad mumbling something about not needing to spend money just because you have enough to buy a small island in the Caribbean. He put all of the suitcases on a cart and began to wheel it outside.

I looked at the curb and didn't see the cruiser.

"Hey, dad. Where's your car?" I heard him mumble something unintelligible and we headed to the parking garage.

"I didn't drive my damn car to pick you up, OK?"

"Dad, please tell me you didn't drive the thing all the way to Seattle. Even you have told me not to drive it too long of a distance, since it is older than dinosaurs." The thing was my 1950-something rusted out, faded red, Chevy truck.

"No, I didn't drive the thing. It's been given its retirement."

"What?" I nearly screamed at my dad.

"Your mom bought you one more surprise, Bells. You can't drive it since you aren't allowed to leave campus without a parent checking you out, but you are going to get to drive it home to Forks."

We stopped beside an absolutely magnificent red convertible.

"This?" I asked timidly. No fucking way. This car is bad ass. No way Renee bought this for me.

"Yes." He rolled his eyes. "I tried to talk her out of this, but you know how your mom is once she decides she is going to do something. There is no talking her out of it."

How I knew that all too well.

"I know, dad. What is it?" I walked around and gently stroked the sides.

"It's a 2011 Astin Martin DBS Volante." I didn't really know car names, but Charlie spoke almost reverently about it.

"Um, it's beautiful. It's really mine?" He opened the truck and put the luggage in, then tossed me the keys.

"Yes, Bells. It's all yours. This thing has some major power. Try not to get pulled over on the way home."

I settled myself in the supple leather seats and sighed. It's like the car was hugging my body. "I think I've died and gone to heaven, dad." He looked over at me and shook his head with a grin.

"It is much more comfortable than the truck. That's for sure."

I started the engine and it purred.

Purred!

Like a kitten. I backed out and began to drive it.

"Dad, this is a sweet ride!"

"It definitely is. Your mom even had a garage built to keep it in while you aren't driving it. To, and I quote, 'Keep the new car out of the harsh weather elements of Forks.'"

I laughed. Dad even used air quotes when he quoted mom.

"Um, there are a few things your mom wanted me to point out about the car. The seats are heated so when you get too cold, you can warm up more quickly. It has a 6-disc CD changer. She shipped a ton of CDs for you. I've got them in your room." I saw him point at the dash. "She said she bought you a new iPod. That can plug in here and you can use it for your radio, I guess. She mentioned something about a USB connector. I have no idea what that is, but there's one somewhere."

"Dad, it's the cable that connects devices to..."

"Bells, you know I don't know a lot about technology." He mumbled again. All I made out this time was mom's name. Dad was funny when he was mad and couldn't win a "fight" with mom. "The most important thing, especially for you and your lack of coordination." He pulled out a box from under the passenger seat. I looked at it as we stopped at a light.

"A first aid kit? Mom got me a first aid kit for the car?" I shook my head as I chuckled.

"Well, you do trip over your own feet, even when you are standing still, so this is probably not a bad thing."

"I know dad. You and mom have told me on more than one occasion that my middle name should have been Grace instead of Marie." He smiled. Then suddenly Charlie's smile wavered.

"I talked to Billy this morning. Everything is in place. You will start school the day after tomorrow." I swallowed nervously and noticed my hands were beginning to shake a little.

"That's good. Thanks for taking care of that for me, dad. I know you probably had to call in every favor you had to make this happen."

"Actually, that was the weird thing. Billy said that when he brought your name up to the board, they immediately said you could attend. You are going to be rooming with Emily. I am not sure how much you remember about her. She's Leah and Seth Clearwater's cousin. She is on the yearbook staff too so you will at least have one class with her." Harry Clearwater was one of dad's fishing buddies and when I was younger we all were often forced to go on the fishing expeditions. I can remember Leah being a little bit of a bitch. I hope her cousin doesn't have the same personality.

"OK. So, uh, when do I move into the dorms?" This was something that was making me very nervous. Being away from Charlie, from my room, the room where I shared so many special moments with Edward.

"When we get home tonight, you need to gather up everything that you need from home and we move you in tomorrow morning. That gives you the afternoon to get settled in before class on Monday morning."

"Sounds good, dad." The rest of our trip was spent mostly in silence. As much as I wanted to ask about Edward and how he was, I knew that dad would likely tell me it was none of my business anymore.

As I pulled into the driveway, it wasn't the huge garage that rivaled our house that caught my eye. It was the spot. I saw the tree and the missing bark from where the first bullet hit. I put my car in park and put my head against the steering wheel. I felt Charlie's hand rubbing my back.

"Are you alright, Bells?" Dad asked, his voice full of concern.

"I don't know. I guess I have to be." I looked over again at the snow-covered ground. I know that by now that the rain and snow washed away the blood that I caused Edward to spill, when I shot him. I couldn't lose it in front of Charlie. Not again. He would ship me out on the next flight to Arizona- for good. I have to be here. This is my home.

I opened the door grabbed my computer bag and headed inside.

O_O_O_O_O_O_O

After I packed everything that I needed for school, I sat down on my bed and looked around the room. Reminders of him were everywhere. I'm not quite sure how to breathe without Edward here. Despite everything, I'm not sure if I'm ready to say goodbye to all that we were. I know it's going to take time for me to not need him anymore.

I walked around the room and all of the reminders of him everywhere. The bed, where we made love and on that day where we fought. My bulletin board was covered with random candid shots of us together through the years. I ran my hand gently over all those reminders of our happier times together. Our first junior high dance. Our junior prom. There is absolutely nothing sexier than Edward in a tux. In the corner of my desk sits a stuffed elephant that he won for me at a carnival. He named it Rosie, because it has rose colored cheeks. I picked it up and went to lay down on my bed. I hugged Rosie tightly to me, as I curled up in bed. I looked at Rosie.

"Tell me how this is supposed to be, Rosie. How am I supposed to make it to tomorrow and the next day and the next, without him?" At that moment, it was as if Rosie's eyes were actually looking right at me in understanding. Nothing is making it easier or taking my pain away. Not even the hours I spend immersed in front of the computer screen or the camera's viewfinder. "Edward knew how much I loved him and that he was my everything. Despite all the lies he told me, Rosie. I loved him. I still love him. I know I shouldn't be wasting my time thinking about him since he's not thinking about me, but I can't just erase all of those memories from my heart and mind, as much as I know that I need to."

I got back up and began taking all the pictures down from the wall. Just the thought of them being in my space was an unimaginable torment.

"I can't believe this is me." I tell myself. I honestly feel as if I am lost in a dream, not a dream, more of a nightmare. Like a coward, Edward left me and didn't even tell me he was leaving. He left it up to our dads! I can't stay this way forever. I'm tired of running away. I have to find a way through this. I have to find myself. Maybe who I am is waiting for me at QIS. I guess I will find out.

O_O_O_O_O_O_O_O_O

Dad loaded everything in the cruiser and we began our trek to La Push. I hadn't been here in years. It had changed a lot. I noticed a small shopping center with a few clothing stores, a music store, a pet store. The other store I saw made me almost happy. It was a Barnes and Noble. I could shop for books in La Push and not have to have Charlie take me to Port Angeles.

"I can't believe how much it has changed here, Dad."

"I know, Bells. Every time I make a new trip here, it seems as though another business has opened. They are building a new sporting goods store. I can't wait. I've never liked going to Newton's for my fishing gear." I inwardly cringed when I remembered what I'd done with Mike-Fucking-Newton. I would not go down that road again. Right now the last thing I want is a relationship- with anyone.

Before I knew it, we had arrived at the school gates. They had a majestic look to them. They were surrounded by stone enormous pillars. At first glance, one would think that the campus was the original from the 1930s, but all of the buildings were immaculate. The first building we past was the brand new multipurpose athletic center, where the QIS Wolves hold all their pep assemblies and the basketball teams play. Next, we passed the three-story brick school building. It didn't look much older than the activity center. In the back of the school, were iron tables and benches. It was obvious it was designed for students to spend time socializing.

"Wow, Dad. This campus is absolutely amazing."

"I know, Bells. Unless you know someone from La Push, you would have no idea of how much things have changed around here. Since the Quileutes opened their casinos, they have had tons of money to not only construct new buildings, but to hire some of the best teachers and coaches from across the country."

"I had no idea that a casino could be so profitable. This campus almost looks like an Ivy League school." I was amazed. This school was unbelievable. It was perfect and this is where I was going to graduate from. Maybe this wouldn't be too bad after all.

"The tribe said that gambling is the white man's ultimate entertainment." Charlie laughed.

"I don't know that I would go that far, dad." I laughed too. "Gambling did pay off for mom, even though it wasn't at a casino."

At last, dad pulled up outside the dorms. There are two, one for boys and one for girls. But these dorms didn't look like any dorms I had ever seen. They looked like luxury condos. Between the two dorms was a plaza-type area that was also designed as a student hangout.

Charlie and I got out of the car. I grabbed my laptop and camera bag. I saw a man in a wheelchair coming down the ramp to see dad. I recognized him immediately. It was Billy Black, dad's best friend and fishing partner.

Dad reached out his hand to shake Billy's.

"It's good to see you."

"You too, Charlie." Billy looked over at me. "Hi, Bella, how are you? What do you think of the campus so far?"

"I'm OK, Billy. You're looking good."

"Well, I'm still dancing," he laughed out.

"This campus is out of this world. I can't believe this is a middle school and high school campus. It looks more like a college campus."

"We are very, very proud of our school here. We are also pleased to have you join our 'little' school."

"Thanks so much for helping me get in, Billy." He glanced at me with a look that I couldn't define.

"It was no problem, no problem at all. Are you ready to see your room?"

"Definitely."

"Emily," Billy said in a bit of a raised voice. "Come on out and meet your new roommate."

I saw an absolutely beautiful girl with long, silky, dark hair and olive skin walk towards me. She radiated beauty. Wonderful. My roommate would be the most beautiful and likely most conceited girl on campus. Just my luck.

"Bella, it is so nice to meet you." She ran up to me and shocked me by giving me a huge hug. She then looked at me with a truly genuine smile. "I can't wait to show you around and show you the yearbook classroom. It has a state of the art computer lab with Macs, and we have tons and tons of Nikon cameras to take pictures. You are just going to love it. Come on, let's go see our room." She grabbed my hand and pulled me with her.

If I didn't know any better, I would say that this was Alice's doppelganger. She and Emily are so much alike it's almost scary. What I could see of the lobby of the dorm as we entered, was furnished incredibly, like a five star hotel. Leather couches, a 72-inch screen television, a bank of desktop computers. It was like nothing I'd ever seen before.

"We are on the top floor in a corner suite." We took the elevator to our floor and she opened the door to our room. I am pretty sure that my mouth hit the floor with a very loud thud. It was designed just like the lobby. "We've got a living area here and a television and a blu-ray player. Billy said that you have your own computer. The entire campus is set up for wireless internet. So no matter where you are, in class or just hanging out, you can use the internet."

"Come on, let me take you to our room." This was nothing like I expected. This wasn't a dorm room. This was an apartment. "We have separate bedrooms, but we share the bathroom."

"This is mine?" I asked. The room was beautiful. There was a computer desk next to an entire wall of windows that overlooked the forest behind the campus. The bed was queen-sized and had the most beautiful bedding I had ever seen. It was in various shades of purple. There were even accents of purple throughout the decor scattered in the bookcases and shelves in my room. "This room is just gorgeous. I love it." I sat my laptop bag on the desk and walked in a circle surveying my surroundings. "Are all of the rooms like this?"

"Well, Charlie told Billy purple was your favorite color and the school's maintenance department put it together for you."

"Do they do this for all of their students?"

"Well..." My question seemed to make Emily extremely uncomfortable. She wasn't looking me in the eye like she had been. "No, they don't. The board wanted to do something special for you after what you've been through." I began to wonder if it was really the board who did this or if it was Renee's doing. Either way, the room was magnificent and at this point, I was for whatever it took to make me feel more comfortable. Dad took that time to make his way into my room with my luggage. He was looking around the room with the same look I likely had a few minutes ago.

"This room is really something, huh, Bells?"

"It's great, Dad."

"We all want you to feel at home here, Bella," Emily said.

"I'm sure it will be fine." I smiled and her and Charlie.

"Bells, I hate to drop you off and run, but Sam got sick and had to take off for the day, so I need to go into the station." I didn't want to cry in front of Charlie, but I had just gotten back to Washington. I was really going to miss him.

"That's fine, dad. I totally understand. I need to get unpacked and settled in, and it could take me all day to get things the way I want them." He came and hugged me and kissed me on the head.

"I love you, Bells. Call me if you need me for anything. I mean anything."

"I will. Thanks again, Char-, dad. I love you, too." I kissed him on the cheek and he blushed.

"Talk to you soon, Bells." Dad walked out the door. I looked around and begin making a list in my mind of what I needed to do, when I heard Emily clear her throat.

"Before you unpack, would you like to go to the student union? I'm supposed to meet some friends there. We can pick up a snack and then maybe we can take a quick tour of the rest of the campus, and I will help you get all your stuff put away when we get back." The look in her eyes was begging me to come along and there was no way that I could tell her no. I've missed having a friend, and I could really see Emily and I being friends. Maybe not as close as Alice and I had been, but...

"Sure."

"That's great. Let's go. I can't wait for you to meet them." She was almost jumping up and down with excitement as she led me to the student union.

As we entered the room, I saw a tall, extremely muscled guy, with short dark hair and dark eyes. He had more muscles than any teenager I had ever seen. He noticed us and smiled. He was gorgeous. I could see his deep dimples from across the room. There was something familiar about him, but I just couldn't put my finger on it.

"Hey, Emily. It's good to see you."

"Hey. I'd like you to meet my new roommate, Bel-"

"Yes, Bella Swan. It's been a long time. I don't know if you remember me or not. I'm Jacob Black."

You Belong to Me Chapter 9

Chapter 9

Disclaimer: We don't own Twilight *sighs* but we do own Possessiveward's pain and suffering.


Songs:

"Seize the Day" Avenged Sevenfold
"I Miss You" Blink 182
"If You're Not the One" Daniel Bedingfield

EPOV

Today is my emancipation day. I am finally going home. Mom brings me some sweats to change into since there is no way in hell I can wear my favorite pair of worn button-fly Levi's, if I even wanted to wear them. I am finally free of all the IVs attached to me and I just enjoyed my last hospital dose of my best buddy ever, M.Y. I ride home in Emmett's SUV with him and my dad, so I can have room to stretch my leg out and keep it elevated.

Mom and Alice are waiting on the front steps of the house, as Dad and Em help me out of the car.

I work my way to the steps, and Emmett offers me his hand to help me up. Damn crutches are worthless. I still have to make it up the stairs to my bedroom. Shit. I'm sweating like it's summer and it's January in Forks. Not good, not good at all.

"Edward, welcome home, honey." Mom hugs me awkwardly around the crutches and kisses me on my cheek.

"Damn, mom, you just saw me before I left the hospital."

"I know. I am just so glad to have you back where you belong. I fixed your favorite for lunch. Meatloaf with my special glazed sauce, with mashed potatoes and gravy. Let's get you settled in your room and I will bring your food up to you, and then you can get some rest." Mom finally stops to take a breath. It is so easy to see where Alice gets her exuberance from. exuberance. I kiss her on the cheek.

"Thanks, mom. It is definitely good to be back. I can't wait to sleep in my bed again. I missed being swallowed in comfort from my pillow top." I am ready for that bed to help M.Y. rescue me from my shattered life.

"Emmett, help Edward up the stairs, please."

"Mom, I was already going to do that." We make our way very slowly up the staircase with dad behind us just in case. With these crutches, it's like Bella's clumsiness had rubbed off on me.

God, Bella...I pause on the steps and rub my chest.

"You okay, E?" Emmett asks. "Can you make it?"

"Yes, I just needed to rest for a minute."

When we enter my room, I am filled with mixed emotions. It is not the way that I had left it. My things were missing. Where the photos of Bella and of Bella and I once sat, were now empty spaces that seemed to be mocking me. My shelves are as empty as the space in my body where my heart once resided. I hear my mom clear her throat.

"Um, we got you a tray so that you can eat while resting in bed and an extra firm pillow for you

to put under your leg," mom says. I move and sit down on the edge of the bed and close my eyes. "Sweetie, what's wrong?" she asked.

"Mom, I'm OK, considering..." I shrug and begin to lay back in bed. My mom props the pillows back behind me, to help me get comfortable.

"Mom, where is all my stuff that was here?" I knew I didn't need to clarify which stuff I was talking about. It was painfully obvious., too obvious.

"Ally and I thought things might be easier this way for you. We don't want you hurting anymore than you already are." My thoughts are jumbled and conflicted. I know that it will hurt seeing the mementos of all our years together, but I love Bella. I can't just let her go, not yet. I need her like I need my next breath. It doesn't matter how she feels about me. I can't just erase her from my mind like she was never here at all.

"Please tell me you didn't throw them away. Those are mine to do with what I want." My tone must have been more harsh than I intended, because my mother flinched at my words.

"Edward, I'm sorry. We didn't do it to hurt you. We just wanted to help. And no, we didn't throw anything away. Alice boxed them up and put them in the attic." I'm relieved. Right now that is all I have left of Bella.

"Sure, I understand." I'm not happy, but I can see that Mom and Alice are doing what they think is best to protect me and my wounded heart.

"Are you sure? We can bring them down to you."

"No, mom, really. You're right. It is probably better this way." She helpeshelps me get my leg arranged on the pillow and tucks the covers around me.

"Let me go get you something to eat. I'm sure you are ready to get some rest, and you will be able to rest better with a decent meal in your stomach." She gently stroksstrokes my cheek before she leaves my room.

I close my eyes and don't want to open them again. I want things how they were a few days ago before the shit hit the fan, and I lost the only thing that had ever mattered to me. I hear a rustling sound, and mom is back with my food. I 'm not really hungry, but I know that I need to eat something. She sets up the tray across my lap and places a plate heaping with my favorite food and a big glass of milk.

"Here you go, sweetie. Enjoy." I dig in while I notice her open my nightstand drawer and removes a small brown bottle, which contains my life preserver. "I put your pain pills here, Edward. Your dad said that you can have some again in another hour or so." She goes to the bathroom and fills a glass with water and sits it beside me. I notice my cell is there as well.

"Let me know if you need anything else, sweetie. Just call me using your cell and I will be right up." She pats her pant pocket and I notice the bulge of her phone. She kisses me gently on my cheek.

"Thanks for everything, mom. Lunch looks delicious."

"You are very welcome my darling boy. Rest well. I love you, Edward." After she leaves the room, I put the plate and glass of milk on my table and move the tray to the floor. I look at the bottle beside me. An hour wouldn't make a difference. I need to feel better and I know that my trusty Mellow Yellow will take all my cares away. I pop the top of the bottle and shake out three pills. "What the hell," I tell myself, as I swallow them back with a large drink of water.

O_O_O_O_O_O_O_O_O_O_O

When I wake up the next morning, I take three more M.Y.'s. I know physical therapy is likely to kick my fucking ass from here to the moon. I have Mmom drive me to my appointment with my therapist, Felix Walker. Dad says he is the best. I know that he won't just have some mediocre guy who can't hack it through med school, take care of me. I'm a fucking star on the football field. Hell, I shine brighter than the fucking sun when I play. I know that it is going to be pure torture, but I am so ready and I know that M.Y. will help me. I need to get my leg better before the USC scout, Aro Blackheart, comes back to talk to me and Em again. I will do whatever it takes to be back to the way I was before the bullet shattered my leg.

I use my crutches and hobble into the building, and luckily I didn't have to get even more "uncomfortable" in one of the waiting room chairs. Felix is in the waiting room waiting for me.

"Edward, right?" He askssays as he reaches out to shake hands with me. He is huge, massive even.

I can see muscles flexing underneath his tightly fitted t-shirt. With his build, it is shocking he isn't on a professional football team somewhere. He is gonna work my ass off, no fucking doubt about it.

"Yes, man. Good to meet you."

"You too. You ready to get started?"

"As ready as I will ever be. How long do you think this session will run today?"

"At least an hour. Mrs. Cullen, you are welcome to wait here in the waiting room." She looks at her watch.

"I think I will go next door to visit with my husband for a few minutes. I will be back before your session is over, sweetheart."

"OK, mom." As she leaves, Felix guides me to an exam room and helpeshelps me up on the table.

"First, I need to tell you that this is not going to be a walk in the park. Your recovery is going to take a lot of work, and you need to follow instructions and do what we ask you to. We want you to heal the right way, and that is going to take some time, patience and perseverance.

"Secondly, this is going to hurt like hell. You need to be prepared for that. If something becomes so painful you can't tolerate it, you need to let me know immediately. Yes, this will hurt, but it shouldn't cause so much pain that you are beyond uncomfortable. In the end, the recovery is in your hands, so do what you are supposed to and nothing else. Got it?"

"I think so. I want to get back on the field and I will do whatever you need me to in order for me to step out on that field at USC, as their freshman starting quarterback." Felix grins and slaps me on the back.

"That's what I want for you too. You're very talented on the field, Edward. Can you lift your uninjured leg for me? Now, your injured leg, see how high you can raise it, but don't push it." I follow his instructions and motherfucker, this shit is horrendously painful and I'm not even doing anything yet. Come on M.Y. do your thing. I am feeling a little sluggish from the three pills, but the pain is still radiating throughout my leg.

"Your mobility isn't too bad. It helps that you were in such good shape before the accident. We

are going to do a few simple exercises today. I'm going to help you get seated in this chair, so

we can begin." I lean on him for support and sit down.

"Alright, Edward. Both feet flat on the ground. First, straighten your uninjured leg out in front of you, then back on the ground. Then do the same with your injured leg. I want you to repeat this 6 times. You may not be able to totally straighten out your injured leg, just do your best." I as soon as I start to straighten out my injured leg, pain shoots through me, but I don't care. As a football player, you hurt and you can't let people see you as a fucking sissy. No way I was going to show my monster of a physical therapist, that I can't do a simple task, like lifting my foot off the floor. You've got to be strong and I will do this, pain or no pain. I finish all 6 repetitions and notice that little bit of exertion, causes me to sweat more than if I had run 10 miles.

"Good, job Edward. I'm impressed that you were able to extend your leg as far as you did." No shit. I'm impressed by myself too, at this point.

"I bow down to you, the all great and powerful Mellow Yellow," I think to myself.

"Now, next exercise, both feet flat on the ground lift first one leg, then the other, keeping your knee bent. It will basically be like you are marching sitting down. Repeat this one, six times as well."

Felix could have been hired by the military to perform torture on our worst enemies. I am covered with a sheen of sweat from head to toe, by the time he puts me through the paces of all the exercises. Then he puts electrodes around my injured leg and uses electricity to stimulate my muscles. This hurts almost as much as the exercises did. This hour seems to drag on for an eternity. When the machine clicks off, Felix appeares at my side to remove the electrodes and helps me to my crutches.

"You did a superb job today, Edward. You should be very proud. I need you to make sure you do these exercises religiously each and every day. Make sure that as soon as you are finished you ice your leg. I just talked to your mom and she said that you already have ice packs at home, so as soon as you get settled, ice your leg for 20 minutes to reduce inflammation. I've got you scheduled for the same time on Monday. Have a great weekend."

"Thanks for your help, Felix." I am nearly out of breath, by the time I get to the waiting area to mom.

"How are you feeling, Edward?" She asks as we make our way outside.

"I feel like I've been shot in the leg mom." She flinches. "Sorry, it's gonna hurt more before I will feel better, but I'm ready to do whatever it takes. It will be like this never happened to me, mom. I will be whole again before you know it." At least physically I can be whole, even though I was pretty sure that emotionally, the damage will never fade away.

As soon as we get home, I struggle to make my way to my room. Stairs and crutches definitely don't mix. I grab my pills, glass, and one crutch, and go to my bathroom. I need some rest now, and M.Y. give me that joyfully. I take three pills and go to sleep.

O_O_O_O_O_O_O_O_O

I talk my parents into letting me stay home and do my school work, instead of trying to go to class on campus. It would be too hard to get around. Plus, I don't want the swarm of people who would want to talk to me, ask about what had happened. I'm not stupid. I know that Bella and I are the talk of the town right now. Fucking nosey assholes in this hole-in-the-wall town, can't keep their nose out of business, where it doesn't belong.

My days followed a pattern. Wake up, take three pills, physical therapy, three pills, lunch, three pills, repeat physical therapy exercises, three pills, dinner, three pills, bedtime, three pills and if I woke up in the middle of the night, for any reason, three more pills. By Tuesday, I noticed that the bottle was nearly empty. The thought of not having my M.Y.'s scared the shit out of me. I looked at the date that I could get a refill and I wasn't due for another one for two more weeks.

I barely had enough to get me through the rest of today. I need them. I can't make it without them. They help me escape from themy physical and mental pain, that envelopes me at every twist and turn. While I am cocooned in the effects of M.Y., my memories fade. Even if it is only temporary. I have to keep those memories at bay, because otherwise I am just cold and empty without her here with me. I can't take it. I miss her heart, body, and soul. How the fuck am I going to get more Mellow Yellow now?

As I was shaving my face in the bathroom, my crutch knocked the shaving cream into the sink.

Then it hit me. I shuffled to my bedside table and picked up my cell and called dad.

"Hey, Edward, how are you feeling?"

"Same dad, but I've got a problem. I was in the bathroom taking my pills this morning, and my crutch knocked my bottle of meds into the sink, and all of them went into the fucking drain!" My voice was filled with misery. This had to work. I had to have more of Mellow Yellow.

"Why doesn't that surprise me, son?" dad laughed. "I'm surprised that you haven't had more problems with your crutches already."

"Gee, Dad, thanks for your faith in me," I said sarcastically. "You know how I hurt after my physical therapy appointments."

"I know," he said in a serious tone. "I will get you a refill, Son, and make sure they make a note that the others were lost, so you will be able to get your next refill when it is due."

"Thanks. I really appreciate it, Dad."

"I would do anything for you, Edward. You know that. I want you to get better and I know how much your leg is hurting you right now. If these are helping cut down on your pain, I want you to have them."

True to his word, dad had a new prescription for me when he got to the house from work. "Let's avoid another incident of the sink eating your meds. Why don't you just keep them on your table here. At least if they get knocked over, we will be able to gather them from the floor."

By the end of the week, Felix thought it would be a good idea for me to walk with the help of a walker. It wasn't a lot of fun, but I was able to do it. He thought I might actually be able to try the treadmill for five or ten minutes next week.

Everyday was the same, but I was becoming more and more sluggish. But Mellow Yellow helped keep me in check physically and mentally. If I didn't take my pills at the normal time, I noticed that I was a little shaky. That fucking sucked.

Pills, therapy, meals, pills, and homework, when the urge stuck me, which wasn't often. I continued to do the exercises again in the evening two or three times, even if I had already done them in physical therapy that day. My leg needed to be strong again. A quarterback with weak legs is not an option, at all. I have to be back at 100 percent and soon. I got a letter in the mail two days ago from Mr. Blackheart saying that he wanted to meet with Em and I next month. If I can't walk without a limp, no motherfucking way am I going to be playing college ball. I can't imagine doing anything else other than playing football. I have to seize the day. I will regret it forever if I don't do absolutely everything in my power to overcome this injury.

The next week, as promised, Felix got me started on the treadmill. I was able to go for ten minutes before he made me stop. I know that I could go for more, but he said no way. He doesn't think I'm ready yet, that it would be too strenuous. He said that the course I'm on right now, I could even start with some light leg weights next week. Em and I have the weight room at home, so once I know what exercises he thinks I need to do, I can do those at home too. I will be better much sooner than anyone thinks. You can take that to the bank.

Even though I'm slowly getting better physically, my heart is another story. Sometimes at night I dream about her and how things used to be, and I wish the dream would never ends. Her name resounds in my head- constantly. The pain from my physical therapy is the only thing that proves that I'm am real anymore. I focus on the pain with an intensity that I've never known.

Without Bella, Edward really doesn't exist, does he? I need somebody and right now that somebody is M.Y. Mellow Yellow helps me escape the world where there is always a familiar sting in my heart. I can remember everything when the high from my meds wears off, and I can't stand it. It eats at my insides and I become incredibly raw. When I take the pills, M.Y. takes the pain away, at least for a little while.

M.Y. is truly my sweetest friend. It's always here for me when the real world threatens to eat me alive. It helps alleviate the horrendous despair that threatens to consume me at every turn. With them, I am someone else, even though I know that the real me is still right here. I barely made it through to the refill with the pills that I had, and dad told me there was no way that I could get a refill for these. He doesn't want me to be addicted to them. Addicted, right... Too late. I can't lose the only thing that is keeping my head above water.

I formulated a plan to help me get more. Dad has two sets of keys to the hospital. He keeps one locked in the safe and he never gets to them. They are there in case of an emergency. He's never had an emergency come up, but I definitely have one. I must have more Mellow Yellow.

When mom went to the hospital to meet dad for their daily lunch date, I went to dad's study and removed the keys from the safe. I put them under my mattress and I just have to wait until the right time. I can get around with my crutches OK, and everybody in my family sleeps like the dead.

The pill room is located in the middle of no wherenowhere. Luckily, the hospital isn't in the 21st century yet, so there are no cameras to document my actions. I may be hurt, but I'm still fast on my feet; no one was going to catch me. It's still winter and I've got my gloves, so no finger prints either. I did some research on the internet, and I know what the bottle could look like. I figure two bottles will be enough, for now. That's 1,000 pills.

I look at the clock. It's 2:45 in the morning. Not a creature is stirring, all the Cullens are out. I grab my keys off the key rack by the garage, and make my way to the hospital, where the only happiness I now know, awaits me.

O_O_O_O_O_O_O_O_O_O